We had left off with my celebrating my 19th birthday with a 2 month old in tow. Not much happened until I moved in with C when I was 21. Before that I had been living on my own with AY and C came and visited when ever he wanted. For those 2 and half years he never changed a diaper or really tried to connect with AY. Should have been a hint, but I stuck with it and pushed for us to move in together. So we did and shortly after that I started pushing him to have another kid. He didn't want to have another and I have always want more than 1. Anyways I did end up getting pregnant behind his back. I should have never done that, it showed lack of forethought and broke a trust that never got repaired. It was a very stressful time and even though our relationship was very rocky I was pushing for us to get married. C proposed when I was 6 months pregnant, I said yes of course. I ended up having KY 6 weeks early he in May of '98 he was 6 lbs 4 oz, it was very stressful. I had gone into the hospital because I thought my water had broke, it hadn't but it turned out that I was 7 cm dilated and didn't even know it. KY was born 6 hrs later and he didn't cry at 1st and they had to give oxygen and I only got see him for a minute before the whisked him off to the Special Care nursery. He spent 24 hrs in a incubator with 100% oxygen to start and they weaned him off the oxygen over the 24 hrs. Thankfully they didn't need to intubate him other wise he would have been transfered to Children's. KY ended up spending 15 days in the Special Care nursery, the nurses were awesome in there. Though C pretty much abandoned me there. He refused to take time off to help out and begrudgingly agreed to watch AY in the mornings just before he went to work and in the evening after she was asleep. How it worked out was we would get up early in the morning. I would pump my milk out from overnight then we get dressed and go to the hospital. I would go into the nursery and sometimes AY would coming to visit her brother but C only ever came in twice. Any ways C would take AY with him while I did my thing in the nursery. He would go get a coffee with AY in tow. And he only gave me an hour anything more than that and he would get really pissy. Then after I was done he would drive us back home and head off to work. So I was left at home with a 3 yr old and still tried from just giving birth and he also expect the house to be clean and dinner on the table when he got home. When he did get home we would have dinner and then I would give AY her bath and put her to bed and then when was asleep I was allowed to go back to the hospital. I had to walk to the hospital from our house which at the time was 7 blocks uphill. This should all should have been a hint, but I stuck it out. And we ended up getting married a year and half later, Sept 25th 1999. I planed the entire wedding by myself and had to fight with C over everything. It was horrible and by the time the wedding date rolled around I realized our relationship was dead and had been for awhile but I could not see a way out. I had agreed to marry him, our wedding was days away and I didn't want to disappoint my family or look like a fool. I also foolishly thought that when we got married things would change and be better. It didn't in fact it got worse, by the time I left we weren't speaking to each other and I was sleeping on the couch in the basement. T C's brother had seen that I was very unhappy and offered to take me out with him to game and the only reason C agree was because it was at time when the kids were already in bed and asleep. Any way through going out I meet A. We became fast friends and he helped me realized a lot of things, including that it wasn't all my fault that things were the way they were. Anyways I came to the decision that I had to leave C, I was miserable. I wanted to take the kids with me but it ended up I couldn't. I tried to got to Welfare to get money to move out with the kids and they wouldn't give me money until I was already moved out. And I was how am I suppose to move out with no money and they said I could go stay at shelter with the kids until I got on welfare and then they only gave me the list for the shelters in the downtown east side. I so was not going to take a 5 yr and barely 2 yr old to a shelter in the Main and Hastings area. My sister agree to do child care for C so that I could leave knowing that there was someone I trusted taking care of my kids. So April 1st 2000, 4 months after the wedding, I packed my life into 2 small bags and left. I was the hardest thing I have ever done saying goodbye to my kids that day not knowing when or if I was ever going to see them again. I had stopped on my way to a shelter to tell A what was going on and that I wasn't sure where I was staying that night. He wouldn't hear any of it, he said I was going home with him whether I liked it or not. So A took me in and 2 weeks later I was served with divorce and custody papers. They were complete bull shit saying that I had abandoned him and the kids with no warning, that he had no idea where I was, and left him for A. All untrue we had been fighting all the time and I was trying to discuss options with him for months before I left. When I did leave I told him that I was leaving and if he needed to reach me he could leave a message with my Mom, who I would be checking in with every so often. And I didn't leave C for A, A just happened to be there when I needed him and he took me in out of the kindness of his heart. Time past and I ended up getting pregnant again shortly there after, not the best decision but I lived with it. It was a very stressful time A was living with his parents and I had to hide the fact I was pregnant and they ended up finding out any ways and kicked me out at 5 months pregnant. I went and stayed with my Mom, sleeping on the floor. The stress cause me to have preterm labour I spent the next month in and out of the hospital. I ended up on enforced bed rest in the hospital at 33 weeks pregnant. I ended up being induced 2 weeks later because the baby stopped moving. AT was born 5 weeks early in Dec '00 weighing in at 5 lbs 7 oz. Turns out the reason she stopped moving is that the placenta had started to pull away. So AT ended up spending 15 days in the Special Care nursery too. Same awesome nurses as from 2 and half years before. So we are now at age 24 and I'm with A. Shortly after AT was born we ended up moving out to Surrey due to A losing his job. We lived out there for 2 years, it sucked and I would never live there again. While out there I got pregnant again and started having preterm labour again this time at 2o weeks pregnant again due to stress. I spent the next 5 months in and out of hospital it sucked. During that time we moved back into Vancouver into A's Aunts basement, which sucked. We lived at Fraser and 24th, I hated it. Anyways I managed to make it to 10 days before my due date. My pregnancy was horrible, I was in horrible pain by the end and could barely walk. I finally had WT in Jan of '03, he weight in at 8 lbs 1 oz. I came to the decision shortly after WT was born that I didn't want to have any more kids and went about having my tubes tied. I had them tied July 2nd 2003 the same day it was announced that we go the Olympics. I remember it clearly, I came home drugged off my ass to see the announcement on the news. In Oct of '04 we moved back to North Van. And things were very rocky with A, by April '06 I had enough. The straw that broke the camel's back was he took $300 that was suppose to be for rent and gambled it away ... then lied to me about it. We had been fighting pretty much constantly since day one about money, he just couldn't be responsible about it and as much as I loved him I couldn't take the instability any more. So I booted him out and 1st person I told was Galen. I will go into Galen and I's back story in another post, Since we now are at age 30. I kicked A out just after my 30th b-day. Next installment the last 3 yrs age 30 - 33, how old I am now. Stay tuned.
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